The ultimate dad joke compilation
Family and Tumblr
That’s it that’s the show
- being late
- things i said five minutes ago
- things i said five years ago
- people touching me
- being around a ton of people
- being yelled at
- wondering if people are talking about me
- every action i do
- and just about everything else
there is literally under 3 months until 2015 and that makes me really scared because all i have done is watch t.v shows the whole time
imagine all your online friends living near you
"KNOCK KNOCK MOTHERFUCKER WHY DIDN’T YOU REBLOG MY POST"
don’t tell my pets to shut up. only i can tell my pets to shut up. you shut up.
pumpkin chocolate chip cookies stuffed with cream cheese
Don’t cover its ears!!
Probably the worst types of people are the ones that shut you down to make themselves look cooler than you, for example if you get excited and squeal and they’re like “woah what was that..” or if you talk loudly because you’re passionate about something and they say “relax dude wow” and then give a look… Like fuck off stop trying to act so cool and collected. You don’t seem more mature you just seem fucking boring and monotonously placid.
please fall in love with me so i can steal your clothes and buy you coffee in the morning and be the one you call when you can’t sleep and hold ur hand 24/7 and kiss you when you get mad at me and just be next to you all the time and oh my god i am so sad
do u have that one person who you kinda just
im so happy youre alive i dont care that youre miles and miles away i just love you a lot and care for you so much
How to get out of saying the “L” word by Victory Brinker